escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
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