so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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