So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
