Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
