i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I need a beard to bite.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize