Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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