So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
ok first of all what the fuck
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
