bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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