let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
