she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
