girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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