come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
be right there i have to get my cape
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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