Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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