I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
