i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize