Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
