this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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