What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Randomize
