Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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