theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
