He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
