I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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