It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
