He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I need moral support for this bender
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
