i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
