he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
