ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
