Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
