Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
