So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
