Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
