you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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