4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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