so that wasnt chicken after all
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
