One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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