So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
