i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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