im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize