thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
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