all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
