apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
