what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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