I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
