there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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