Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Randomize
