it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize
