I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
