Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
