I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
