I heard we made out
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize