i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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