Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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