Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
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